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ConfusedAboutMyFeelings wrote:

Hi, guys —

I am a Catholic who is completely straight, but I am 16 years old and starting to have, well, feelings for other girls.

I mean I know it is wrong for me to like them but I cannot help myself. I mean I would never be together with them, and love them in that way but I just think a couple of girls at my school are kind of cute.

  • Am I sinning?


  { As a teenage girl, is it a sin if I have feelings toward other teens of my own sex? }

Mary Ann replied:

Dear ConfusedAboutMyFeelings —

It is perfectly normal for girls to pass through a stage where they have romantic feelings toward other girls. It is really a time of intense friendships; a time when girls learn to differentiate themselves from others and discover their own unique selves and personalities.

However, this normal time of close friendship has become sexually interpreted in our perverse times.

  • Because our culture is more sexualized
  • because girls become sexually aware at a younger age
  • because homosexuality is now considered natural (which it isn't), and
  • because all attraction is now seen as sexual

this close female bonding easily takes on a sexual interpretation, which is completely unnecessary. However, I would say that having these attractions, while not a sin, could sometimes be a sign that:

  • one needs good peer relationships or a close mother, or
  • that one is insecure in her own identity.

In any case, feelings come and go, and are not to be followed when they would lead us to do things that are wrong.

Be a good friend to good people, and be close to your mom, if possible. If not, be close to a good adult female role model.

Mary Ann

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