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Anonymous wrote:

Hi guys,

I live in the United States, but my family is from Central America. I'm a 25-year-old female who was brought up with Catholic beliefs. I am a virgin but my boyfriend is not. We have been dating for 5 months now. My question is:

  • What is the reasoning behind the Catholic teaching on staying a virgin until marriage?

I know having pre-marital sex is against Catholic teachings, but I really don't know why.

Thank you for your reply.



  { What is the reasoning behind the Catholic teaching on staying a virgin until marriage? }

John replied:

Hi Anonymous,

It's very simple:

Marriage is a covenant, and sexual relations between a man and a woman consummate the covenant.

Marriage is an act, or rather, a lifestyle of giving oneself to the other totally. The two become one; they not only share a bed, but they share their entire lives, including the practical things like expenses and bank accounts.

  • So, aside from the theological aspects, how can you share your body with someone whom you don't share your bank account with?
  • How can you give your body to someone whom you don't give the pin number to your ATM card to?

Obviously, there are deeper theological reasons for the Church's teaching. Check out:

Sometimes, it helps just to look at the practical implications of our behavior as well.

Hope this helps,

John DiMascio

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